Mike Janelle

As many of you may know, Colorado cycling legend, Mike Janelle, passed away last Thursday. I had the pleasure to meet Mike at 24 Hours of Moab this past October, and I've got to say that he was a class act. I didn't know him well, but everyone who did had only great things to say about him. The Colorado cycling community, as well as the broader US cycling community, has lost a fantastic ambassador for the sport. He will be remembered fondly by all. Just another reminder to live every day to its fullest. I'm pretty sure Mike did, and there's no reason why you shouldn't too. Just like Ferris Bueller says, "Life goes by pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." Check out VeloNews for more info.

100 Miles of Desert

Everybody likes birthdays. Everybody likes friends. Everybody likes biking. Everybody likes 100 mile vision quests in the Utah desert.

Well, okay, that last one is a little bogus. Nevertheless, for me, and a few other friends, it seemed like a good idea to celebrate my birthday last weekend by riding the White Rim Trail in Moab, UT. Trail is a loose approximation of the experience. In truth, most of this “trail” could be negotiated with one of the IMBA Subarus. Despite that, it traverses some of the most amazing canyonland that Moab has to offer, and on a mountain bike, it’s one of the best ways to see the scenery. We headed out at dawn and didn’t return to the cars until sunset. All told, it was about nine hours of riding, with a solid two hours of sightseeing, picture-taking and eating mixed in. The route is mostly flat, but it finishes with a massive climb up what at first appears to be a shear canyon wall. After about 90 miles, that last 2,000 feet of elevation gain is quite unwelcome, not to mention the 5 miles of false flat road afterwards to complete the loop. Needless to say, I was a tired boy on Sunday, but it was well worth it.



Livin' on the edge...



Sunsets are purty.

CAF Guitar Hero Hall of Fame Inductee

Freedom!

Freedom!!!!!Scott, our house crosser, ripped it up!
Ryan Trebon, you fought valiantly! We hereby knight you as Sir Ryan of the Chamois Army Fort.

There is nothing under the kilts

Grandpa C$ wants to express his gratitude to members of the chamois army fort for totally killing the cheering section! Brandon gave the entire "they can never take our freedom" speech from Braveheart to all the 'cross racers. That was one of the best things I have ever seen. I hope they get some serious press from this. You know, as grandpa gets older, each memory becomes even more precious. So to Andy, Spencer, and Brandon, hats off lads.

Actually, just getting to ride the first lap of that course was an amazing experience in itself. It was awesome to hammer through the barriers with everyone screaming. I can't even imagine what something like the world championships must be like.

peace out,
gc$

ROCK!

This past Monday, I headed down to the lovely Five Points area of the Dirrty D to meet up with good friend and CAF alum Kevin for a concert. What illustrious band brought us to a dive like the Larimer Lounge? Why, Electric Six of course! Only one of the finest rock & roll outfits on tour today. If you have a taste for quirky eclecticism as I most surely do, then I'm sure you'll love these rockers from Detroit. Check out some of my cameraphone pics from the show... so gritty, so raw. You can just feel the pulsing energy imbued in the music.


The White Wolf. An amazing lead guitarist.

24 Hours of Moab

Ah, I can finally breathe. The telltale signs of silicosis are gradually fading as my lungs purge the Moab desert from their sensitive alveoli. The race was fun and very hard. The course was a lovely combination of nasty, ledgy rocks and deep sand pits. I just pretended that I was in the Baja 1000 and rallied as hard as possible. Overall everything went very smooth. I bent my chain on my second lap at twilight and almost got caught out in the dark without a light, but I made it back in time and fixed the bike with my bare hands. My team of four did 15 laps (225 miles) and overall, all of the "Team IMBA" teams raised over $15,000 for IMBA. Not bad! I'd say the best part of the weekend was when I broke out my glorious CAF skinsuit for the first lap. Feast your eyes upon its beauty...

Watch It!

This is one of my heroes. His dandy voice makes even the most anti-choice Granny's panties moist.

ANNOUNCEMENT! Writer's Table

Friends of the Fort! And fans whom we may not yet know! This Friday evening marks our first ever Writer's Table! If you've got a research paper you're stuck on, a short story that needs tweaking, a new concept for a blog that you want to put into production, or a love letter that has to be beyond perfect so she'll dump him, then this is the place for you! We'll share ideas and help each other break through the difficulties we may be experiencing, and maybe we'll even write something as a group!

As it's taking place Friday, this will be an informal gathering with wine and maybe some cookies, please dress accordingly. Also, please RSVP in the comments section so we know how many to plan for. Shall we say 8:00? Yay!

my new gangster hat from the state fair

The Journey is Over

I am so glad to be back in Boulder right now. For the past 10 days I've been traveling all over the Southwest. It started two Sundays ago. I drove down to Vegas with one of my coworkers for Interbike. And we're not just talking about a quick, pop-in for one day type of Interbike trip. Oh no, I was there for all five days. It was quite exhausting. Vegas isn't really that great either, unless you're a fan of price gouging, claustrophobia, artificial light, gambling and readily available hookers. After what seemed like an endless five days, I took off and drove up to Tahoe for Xterra Nationals. Needless to say, the legs weren't 100% after a week of Vegas, but I was doing okay, especially since the Venetian (our hotel) had a decent pool to swim in.
Once I'd grabbed an In-N-Out burger (one of Vegas' few redeeming qualities) I set off on a high-speed burn up to the lovely mountains. It was a long, grim drive through the desert. There were only a few scattered towns along the way and several houses of ill repute... great places to get a VD.
Tahoe was a lovely counterpoint to Vegas' tacky artificiality. It was quite cold (snow was on the ground my first morning there!) and very scenic. The race went relatively well. I was a little disappointed with my bike leg, but my swim was quite good. All in all it was good learning experience. Next year, I'll be throwing down pretty hard at that race. Once the post race celebrations were over and I'd slept off most of my severe hangover, I drove straight back to Boulder, all 1,000 miles, yesterday. It's good to be back in the Fort. Check out some of the photos shot by my fancy new phone...



Now I've seen the Eiffel Tower in both Paris and Vegas... not too hard to say which is nicer.



Looks like you're outside, right? Nope. You're inside the Venetian Hotel, on their "Canal."



Rock Racing had a Lamborghini on display. Nice work guys, way to waste your money on some pointless shit.


You can see why people want to "Keep Tahoe Blue."

What is he doing down there?

What is Uncle Mysterio up to, you wonder? What is going on in that room of his? Is he concocting some secret potion to win over a girl? Is he casting a spell on some poor bug that happened to scuttle across the cold green floor? Are there other Mysterios in there, attending a nightly gathering of enigmas? Maybe he disappears through a portal to some ancient place and walks among maidens and sorcerers. That tale about the spring nymph, otter, and golden clam wasn't fiction at all. Or was it?

You'll never know.

Holler!

This is some gangsta-ass shit!

A Look Into the Future via Flight of the Conchords

Moto Tag - C. Springs

A bit of subliminal advertising for those who find the pain-cave behind the motor.

Female Beefeater to guard Tower

This is self-explanatory, and that goes without saying.

from BBC.com:

The Tower of London has appointed a female Beefeater for the first time in its history.

The Yeoman Warder, who has not been named, will join the 35-strong guard in September after undergoing training.

She fought off competition from five other candidates, all male, and will replace a retiring Beefeater.

A successful candidate must have served a minimum of 22 years in the forces as well as boast a long service and good conduct medal.

Spokeswoman Natasha Wollard said: "There were six candidates for the vacancy, and she was the only female. She was awarded the job on merit.

"Because woman have been carving out careers in the forces... they are starting to come up. More women have got the criteria that they need."

The new Beefeater's scarlet livery uniform will be the same as her male colleagues' although it will be altered to fit her figure.

Her role will involve acting as a guide for tourists visiting the Tower, which is more than 900 years old.

Beefeaters have been guarding the Tower since 1485 - for 522 years.

The Beefeater nickname of the Tower of London's Yeoman Warders is thought to derive from the daily ration of meat they received.

Their full title is Yeoman Warder of Her Majesty's Royal Palace and Fortress the Tower of London, and Members of the Sovereign's Body Guard of the Yeoman Guard Extraordinary.

For state occasions they wear the well-known ceremonial dress of red and gold with red stockings, a white ruff and black patent shoes.

For everyday duties they wear dark blue trimmed with red.

Hot Chicks with Douche Bags

If this picture makes you want to vomit, then check out this great website!

It's Business Time

If you're looking to get it on with your lady friend (or vice-versa...) I highly recommend this saucy tune. I'm not sure who it is, but it is so fine, SO FINE!

Police to conduct DUI checkpoint

FYI:
"The Boulder Police Department will be conducting a DUI checkpoint beginning at approximately 10 p.m. on Saturday, Aug. 25, in the 1400 block of Canyon Boulevard. The department will use grant funds as part of the "Heat is On" campaign through the Colorado Department of Transportation. The stationary checkpoint will be staffed by as many as 14 officers and is scheduled to run until 4 a.m. The Boulder Police Department reminds everyone to drink responsibly and always have a designated driver."

new house, new job, new underwear?

Howdy y'all, Brandon here. So I've been thinking about life changes recently. Last month I was living on my own in a one bedroom apartment, and now I am living with four crazy awesome dudes! This change hasn't been hard at all because it's just too darn fun here at the Chamois Army Fort. Whereas last month I would come home from work and just sit around, now I come home from work and join in on whatever's going on, whether it be watching a movie, making dinner, or practicing parcour by jumping off the roof. To sum it up, it rules!

The next big change I'm making is in the work department. I've been full time at Performance Bike Shop for the last year, but I'm leaving at the end of next week to start a job with a company called SmartEtailing. The company makes web platforms for bike retailers, and my job will be writing descriptions of bikes and cycling accessories for the sites. Bikes and writing are two things that I love, and I feel really lucky to have found and landed this job. I'll definitely miss the people at Performance, but I think it will be a good change as I'll be making more money, improving my writing skills, and having more of a schedule. Working in retail with an ever-changing schedule, time just kind of oozes by. It's nice working different shifts and doing something different every day, but I'm looking forward to the structure of a schedule, and being able to enjoy a full weekend. I think I'll take more advantage of my free time when it comes regularly, and I plan to make some fun trips up to the mountains this fall.

The last thing I want to discuss is switching from boxers to boxer-briefs. Now this might sound like small potatoes compared to the other two topics, but believe me, this is by far the most daunting and nerve-wracking change of them all, and I have no idea what will result. Last week, my ratio of boxers to boxer-briefs was 13-1, and the latter were a pair purchased specifically for hiking. I only wore them when I was slacking on laundry and had nothing else left, and though I was not unhappy on the days they were worn, I never moved them closer to the front of the drawer.

However, on a recent bike commute home from work, I had a falling out with my beloved boxers, and this horrible incident led me to consider the many advantages of boxer-briefs. On Monday, I decided to invest six bucks in the issue and purchased a 3-pack of this hybrid style of drawers. I've been alternating for the last four days, and I must say that I am genuinely impressed with the BB's. I'm definitely going through some anxiety about completely overhauling my underwear drawer, and perhaps this infatuation with boxer-briefs is simply a dirty adulterous affair that will only be a bad memory one day; but it could also be that I've found the love of my life.

I feel like Rachel McAdams towards the end of Wedding Crashers, just completely and utterly confused. I wish Christopher Walken was here to help me through this crisis.